Realizations as I Write…

The things I realize as I write this story... ~It makes my dad's death realer than it ever had been before. The pictures, the memories, the realization that I am so lucky and honored to have had the father I did, these all resurface and it socks me in the stomach sometimes and makes my … Continue reading Realizations as I Write…

He Took Pride in Me…

(Continuation of the post Being an Umpire....)   My dad also enjoyed attending my swim meets when I swam for the local YMCA swim-team for a few years, and he became my personal trainer the first year I did the annual, summer Hershey Track and Field Meet. My father had also played sports growing up and, … Continue reading He Took Pride in Me…

Sidenote #12-Listening….

"Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak." -Epictetus  "If you spend more time asking appropriate questions rather than giving answers or opinions, your listening skills will increase." -Brian Koslow "Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it … Continue reading Sidenote #12-Listening….

Being an Umpire…

(Continuation of the post-Abuse at School...) My father supported and even got involved in some of the activities I pursued as a young child. One of the most amazing things my father did for my friends and I, during my youth, was demand to be the umpire of our softball league. When I first started … Continue reading Being an Umpire…

Abuse at School…

(Continuation of the post: Breaking the Cycle of Abuse) My father also experienced abuse at school. All of the schools he attended as a child were Catholic parochial schools, right up until getting expelled from the last one in eighth grade. When I was little, there were two stories he told me about his elementary and … Continue reading Abuse at School…

PEOPLE are PEOPLE (Sidenote #9)

This week has been especially challenging for me. There is a constant load of tasks I am anxious and driven to complete daily: meditating, drinking tea, voicing my beliefs through writing, taking a Materia Medica course online, mothering, housekeeping, volunteering, conversating (a lot more in public than usual), connecting, and promoting simple gestures of kindness … Continue reading PEOPLE are PEOPLE (Sidenote #9)

Heartbroken and Delirious…

(Continuation of the post: An Infinitely Tragic Day) The first person to call me on July 18, 1996 was someone I had met the night before, while camping. His name was Aaron, an 18 year old man from De Pere, WI. We had shared an infatuated, euphoric night talking to one another under the stars. … Continue reading Heartbroken and Delirious…

An Infinitely Tragic Day….

(Continuation of the post: The Phone Call) From there I went upstairs to my friend who had awoken to this insanity happening in our house, and told her, "My daddy's dead," "My daddy's dead," as if I had morphed back into a 7 year old child. I felt scared, abandoned, and my natural instinct was … Continue reading An Infinitely Tragic Day….

Sidenote #7-Journal Entry July 18, 1996

I have mentioned in my story that I began journaling in 5th grade as a way to help me cope with anxiety, perfectionism, and depression. This is something I continued to do as a teenager. It gave me an outlet for my emotions and all the various issues I dealt with during this confusing, somber … Continue reading Sidenote #7-Journal Entry July 18, 1996

The Phone Call…

(Continuation of the post: Steadfast, Undaunted, and Valorous) We lived in Wisconsin and the winters, when I was younger, were very snowy. My dad did all the maintenance of our outdoor property, which included; snow blowing. He snow-blowed our driveway, sidewalk, and porch as well as, many of our close neighbor's sidewalks and driveways. During … Continue reading The Phone Call…